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59 Batshit Crazy ways to get your resume read

59 Batshit Crazy ways to get your resume read

    1. To get your resume read, invent a fucking time machine and go back to the 1990’s and apply in person. Don’t forget your firm handshake!!!#winning #tigersblood.
    2. To get your resume past the Applicant Terrorizing System, invent a new ATS platform. That way you’ll actually know how it works instead of being told to redo your resume over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again by recruiters.
    3. Want to get your resume in front of people? Create a viral youtube channel dedicated to parodying popular songs. “Oops I applied again” by Britney Spears is a top choice, and you know you’ll score the gig with “I want to get paid” by the Backstreet Boys.
    4. Here’s a neat tip for getting in contact with hiring managers: hack their email account and slowly drive them crazy by rewriting their drafts. Once they start to cave under the mental stress, message them on their own account telling them you’ll stop terrorizing them when they read the resume you sent 7 weeks ago that has been left unopened in their inbox.

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Posted by kleigh in Jobs, Stories, 0 comments